ABreak

This past week has been a great way to relieve stress.  With the minor break from school and the chance to catch up with old friends and family, and also a time to give thanks for what we have.  I am still not fully healed or to my full potential so I can get back to my gymnastics and dancing resume, but that will hopefully come by the end of Christmas break.

A large realization hit me over this break.

Life.

Life hit me.

Talking with my parents about the things they have, and the things I want made me realize how quickly I am growing up.  As well as everyone around me.  It seems like senior year in high school was only yesterday.  Obviously there are many more responsibilities that we must take care of and calculate into the equations of our daily life.  But my parents really made me realize what I am going to have to do very soon.

Added to this conversation, my injuries have not helped me keep hope for my passion of becoming a professional dancer/artist.

But God has a plan for me.

I cannot give up or doubt myself.  The transition from being a teenager to being an adult have made me only want to achieve my goals even more.  I can only pray that I am aided in school and my body is assisted to heal.  

There is a silver lining.  But I just am unable to see through all the grey.

WhyShouldIWorry

Sometimes I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I cant help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear take the wheel and steer.  


Lyrics from a great Incubus song.  

As of late, during the weekly grind, like anyone else, I have had the turmoils of life thrown at me.  Feeling weathered and overexerted.  But there is always tomorow and I will be ready for whatever it has.  Training what I love, gymnastics and breakdancing, takes up a very large amount of time and energy.  This makes school increasingly harder and more difficult.  The obvious stress of being a college student and having a large amount expected of you has started to make a large impression on my mind.  

These lyrics reflect what my random thoughts exhibit sometimes.  There is a large amount of uncertainty everyone faces everyday about the tasks of today, the people in your circle,  the consequences of certain urges, the everlasting question of what if?, the doubt in ourselves that is inevitable.

And many a time we will let these things affect our present state of mind.  But in the end when these things are overwith, will any of that stress and worrying be worth it?  I know this is like saying never worry again, which is impossible, but lately I have been trying to greatly reduce the amount of which I worry and look at things from a logical standpoint.  Because it will all be over soon enough.  I still put pressure on myself occasionally to accomplish what I want, but when things come that are out of my control, I feel it is best to let things ride themselves out and play like a drifter.  Say, a spider web or a lilly pad.  In this case more so like a kite.  A kite drifts freely in the wind, but is controlled by the human, who decides where it will fly, and when it will come down.  We as humans are not in control over many things in this lifetime.  The wind.  It can take us anywhere and everywhere. 

Why not enjoy the ride?  

And if danger or tribulations approach lets say a tree, we have enough control over ourselves to bring ourselves back.  

These are hard times my friend.

We are all flying our kites in dead forests.  Ones with leafless tress and branches reaching out waiting to claw our kites down.  Maybe if we just try to learn to drift above the trees.....

All these stresses and worries are not worth the time and effort.  We need to learn to be able to see past the trees and focus on ascension.  Tomorrow is a new day with new weather.

But whatever tomorrow brings I'll be there.  

Song of the mood - Incubus - Drive

What'sGoingOn

I haven't been as consistent with blogging as I'd like.  I hope I'll get to a few posts this weekend when I have more time.  But here's what's happening

- School. Gotta pass.  Working as hard as I can

- Gymnastics.  Slowly but surely getting there

- Bboying.  Coming up.  Mad inspired more than ever.  Time to REALLY take what I've learned and put it into action and make my name.  175 Num-Skul Revolution. Doubt = Death. MurderDeathKill

- Music.  May be getting into it more.  And new releases = whole new life.  Definitely need to update my library.

- Knowledge.  Learned so much these past few months.  Lots of new perspectives and philosophies developing and being tweaked.  Thoughts everywhere.

- Social life.  Everything seems so blurred. am I too ____? not enough ____?

- The one.  I hope she's alright.  Hopefully things can work out

- Finding His way.  Trying to really feel God's voice in my life and find my path and follow His orders


Lots more happening.  Even more on my mind.  This is just a post to overview what I will be writing about in the next few weeks.  More consistent posts coming soon.

Song of the mood - Smif N Wessun - Rekognize

Be blessed all.

- Contra